You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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