Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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