what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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I need you to use more vowels.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
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