I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
