You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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