to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
