you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
