how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
They left me at home... I'm a liability
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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