Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
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