My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!