After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
