So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
