Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
