my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize