accomplished twins. life is a go
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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