Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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