Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
i out mim tonsoeep
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