I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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