ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
