Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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