so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
