We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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