i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
