Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
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