Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
