last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I want to be your penis for a week.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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