If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize
