theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
as a side note pls kill me
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