I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
