oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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