I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
