I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
