ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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