I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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