Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
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