I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I pour the whiskey from now on
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize