Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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