Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
