u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize