I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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