just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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