No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
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