i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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