Kiss
Puke
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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