You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize