You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
now i know why i became what i already was.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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