Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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