Soap is not a condiment
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
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we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
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I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
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