Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
