if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I had to cum in my sink.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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