glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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